Monday, June 6, 2011

Parents, leave those kids alone!


I’ve been asking myself this question for quite a long time: Is childhood still the same as it was only a few decades ago or were we just privileged enough that our parents and the society they lived in made a happy and carefree childhood for us possible? When I came home after school at midday, my mother had a delicious home-cooked meal   waiting for me and I would spend the rest of the day playing with my sister, climbing trees, exploring the forest or visiting my grandparents. On the weekends we went on family trips, visited my cousins or went hiking. We even had so much fun going to school that sometimes on the weekends we went to work with my father, the local headmaster of a primary school, to play “school” in the classrooms. (Some of you may be thinking that we were two exemplary children of a teacher and in some ways I guess we were, but believe me we also did a lot of crazy stuff my father doesn’t need to know about…so, in general, we were two perfectly normal children.) We had a lot of free time and even though we weren’t doing our homework or practicing anything in particular, I was learning a lot for life. From time to time I participated in children’s musicals which were performed in our village, I also learned to play a few instruments – just for fun without being pressured into practicing two hours a day on each of them – and I just did what I loved to do. This is what I call a carefree childhood, one that I happily look back on. But, unfortunately, times have changed considerably since then.  
Now, hardly any child is allowed to be just a child anymore because parents start putting pressure on them at a very early age. Often, parents don’t have enough time for their children and send them a child-care center a few months after birth. And many mothers just don’t have a choice, considering that they’re legally only allowed to stay at home for one year in order not to lose their job. I think that they’ll get to know the harsh reality soon enough. Nowadays, shortly after being born children are already forced to experience how hard life is. At a very early age their parents force them to learn several instruments, attend ballet classes, join several sports clubs or go to extracurricular English classes. Even though I think that parents only want the best for their children, I think it’s often just too much for most children to deal with. 

At the age of 6 things get worse. The daily grind of school takes away the little free time they had before. Parents want their children to be the best and most intelligent and are willing to spend an enormous amount of money on private tuition, after-school classes or summer camps. That’s often the moment at which the little free time the children had completely fades away. During my studies, I earned some money giving private tuition and I often couldn’t believe how hard it was to find time for the classes with a ten-year-old child. Monday was ballet and choir day, Tuesday was tennis, Wednesday was the day for trumpet lessons, not something the child looked forward to, Thursday afternoons were devoted to studying for tests and doing homework – apparently there was no time for that during the first few days of the week – and on Friday she was so exhausted that trying to learn English with her was doomed to failure in advance.
Now, the federal government in Austria is discussing obligatory all-day schooling. This definitely won’t improve the situation at all, considering that children then would come home at six o’clock in the evening, go to bed at seven – so what will be left of their precious free time? 

We have to ask ourselves whether all this education is really more important than having a happy and carefree childhood. Do we really learn so much more by taking music classes we’re not the least bit interested in, instead of inventing and playing creative games with friends and running around in the garden without really having any aim? I just don’t understand why parents tend to pressure their children into early education and why they all want to raise the most intelligent and able children. Is it really worth it? I often have the feeling that for certain parents their children’s schooling is more important than their children’s happiness. We need to stop putting so much pressure on our youngest generation. Children can have a good education without having been forced to do extra classes every day. 

I was a carefree child who was never forced to take ballet classes, music or English lessons – my parents allowed me to decide how I wanted to spend my free time. I’m now nearing completion of two university degrees. Early education is not everything. I think the key to happiness is being able to actually live and enjoy your life – let’s not take this away from our children.

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