Vacations Suck

At the close of the school year, every student’s brain enters into“countdown mode”.  Despite every teacher’s attempt to tie us down with dooming exam dates, reports, presentations, etc . , we’ve got only one thing on our minds: SUMMER.

“What are your plans?”

“Will you be in the city?”

“We should hang out.”

It’s been so since the beginning of time, well probably not, but the one thing that I’ve learned in my 22 years of age is that summer actually sucks.

In 22 years I’ve seen almost all of Bosnia and Croatia, travelled through Spain, France, and Italy, cruised up and down the California Coast, but I’ve come to realize that no one ever really talks about the bad parts of vacationing. So here’s my short list of why vacationing sucks:

1.       Family.

I love my family, but when you think about it, how much do you actually know these people? We’ve shared a home since my birth, but 24/7 is a new level of living. Two weeks into the vacation I start to realize how truly weird human beings are. Does my dad always talk this much? Why is my mom counting every penny? Then come the arguments.  You know what I mean: mom has one extra glass of wine with dinner and all of the sudden your college education turns into a full-on debate.  Vacation can be a time of relaxation, but it can quickly also turn into a fire-breathing dragon, ensnaring you in its spiked tail, its emblazoned eyes seeing into the depths of your soul.

2.       Sunburn.

Don’t ever fall asleep on a raft. Just don’t.

3.       Money.

I’ve come to visualize money as a plastic bag filled with water. The tighter you squeeze it, the faster the water gushes out. Don’t even think of ripping the bag open, your money will disappear faster than you can curse the money gods.

I figured out how to plan ahead. And then I figured out not to underestimate how much money I love to spend. There will never be enough money to do everything you want, so don’t attempt to; otherwise you’ll end up back at college, eating value-sized packages of pasta with ketchup for two months. Not that that’s ever happened to me.

4.       Boredom.

On the off chance that you are cool, or an adult, and no longer vacation with family this probably doesn’t apply to you. But I’m sure everyone has experienced a variation of this phenomenon in their lives.

There you are lounging at the beach, staring out at the sea and suddenly it hits you, “I’ve been doing the same thing for a month.” Swim, eat, sleep, swim, eat, sleep.  Slowly your mind wanders to your friends back home, how they’re all attending the outdoor music festivals, meeting other awesome people, sipping chai tea with their new, awesome friends.

So if you decide to opt out of the mirage that is a “vacation” and stay at home, don’t be fooled, this also sucks.

Granted, you do save money, but most of your time is spent wishing you were on that boring sea coast, getting tan and swimming; that or your brain is being destroyed by the internet. And since I’m already being honest, Facebook is never interesting during the summer. Why?  Because EVERYONE IS ON FRIGGIN’ VACATION.

So here’s my advice to you:

1.       Get a job.

First, this gets rid of the dooming glare of that dragon. Somehow, your parents start thinking of you as an independent and mature young adult. I’m not joking, they will praise you. It doesn’t even matter if you spend it all, as long as your summer endeavors are not coming out of their pocket.

Second, you will actually have money to spend. This means, yes, you can afford those shoes. And, yes, this would be a good time to buy a cat.

Third, your time will be split in half. This means, goodbye boring Facebook updates from people who are staycationing and bored out of their minds.

2.       Get a good book.

Trust me, when you return to college and your brain is all maxed out from alcohol and sun rays, the last thing you’ll want to do is focus on small print. Feeding your brain is healthy, plus you’ll broaden your vocabulary to impress all those cool people you’ll meet. Which leads to number 3…

3.       Meet cool people.

Don’t just stick to your same old friends. Summer means new people, from all corners of the world, are moving in and out of cities. This is an opportunity to learn about different kinds of people and cultures.

New people will bring new experiences, even if you are staying in your home place. New people are up for climbing mountains and biking through forests, they can open you up to a world your lame friends just wouldn’t be interested in.

4.       Get drinks.

Because it is summer and no other time of the year would it be excusable to sit in a field, drinking Sangria and blasting music.

5.       Travel unexpectedly.

This is something I’ve only picked up in the last year. Here’s what you do:

-          Check for travel deals/cheap flights

-          Book it

-          Pack lightly (when I say lightly, I mean, lightly)

-          Do it.

Some people fear all the things that could go wrong and, therefore, they study their itinerary religiously, planning out every footstep they plan on taking. Vacations never go as planned, much like life, and trying to have control over it is completely pointless. Anyways, being in control doesn’t mean relaxed, which is why you decided to go on vacation in the first place, right?

6.       Travel alone.

It sounds scary, I know, but trust me, it’s exhilarating.

Last summer, I travelled to Venice alone. It ended up being much more enjoyable than when I made the same trip with my parents years before.

This past January, I booked a flight to Ireland, at the end of February I landed in Dublin with no clue of where I was going to go. I spent a week meeting new friends all over the island, skipping from city to city. I had no expectations of what I should do or who I should see, but I ended up being catered to by the ever-so-charming Irish and had the best vacation of my life.

I experienced Rag Week at University of Limerick; Google it, it’s ridiculous. I was blown away by all the sights, food, pubs, and music of Galway. I drove from coast to coast, taking in the nature along the way. For the grand finale, I was in Dublin city. I don’t remember much about Dublin, but that was bound to happen during my stay there.

7.       Chill out.

If there was one bit of advice I’d follow more than the others, it would be just to chill out. Play some music, take a deep breath, lay back because its summer.  Sooner or later, you’ll be back in a nook of the library up to your ears in stress, so you might as well enjoy it while you can.